Relationship Issues – Understanding the Patterns That Pull Us Apart

When Connection Hurts More Than It Heals

Intimate relationships can be our greatest source of joy—and also our deepest well of confusion, pain, and vulnerability. You might find yourself stuck in repeating dynamics. Maybe closeness feels overwhelming. Maybe distance feels unbearable. Maybe you’re constantly navigating conflict, or struggling to name your needs at all.

Whether you’re in a relationship, moving through a breakup, or noticing patterns that follow you from one connection to the next, I offer a space to explore what’s happening beneath the surface. Not to assign blame. Not to “fix” your communication. But to understand what’s been shaping your experience of love, trust, and closeness.

Relationship Templates Are Formed Early

We all learn how to relate through our earliest attachments. If those relationships were inconsistent, unpredictable, critical, or emotionally unavailable, we may find ourselves reenacting those patterns—seeking safety through control, withdrawal, appeasement, or pursuit.

In our work together, we begin to map those early emotional blueprints. This doesn’t mean staying stuck in the past. It means understanding how your nervous system learned to love, protect, and defend—and how those strategies may now be keeping intimacy just out of reach.

Conflict as Communication

Arguments often carry more than they appear to. They’re not just about who didn’t do the dishes or why someone didn’t reply to a text. They’re about being seen. About being chosen. About feeling safe in expressing vulnerability without fear of being dismissed or abandoned.

In our sessions, we slow the conflict down. We look at the patterns—not just what’s said, but how it’s said, when it’s said, and what gets left unsaid. We listen for the longing beneath the criticism, the fear beneath the silence. And we begin to explore how new kinds of dialogue might emerge.

Shame, Mistrust, and the Fear of Need

Many of us have been taught that needing others is weak—or that our needs are too much. As a result, we may struggle with emotional expression, with asking for reassurance, or with tolerating our partner’s distress.

Together, we begin to unlearn that shame. We make space for the parts of you that feel needy, anxious, avoidant, demanding, or cold. These aren’t character flaws. They’re strategies for surviving relationships that felt uncertain.

In therapy, we welcome these parts—not to get rid of them, but to understand what they’re protecting. And when those parts feel safe enough, they begin to loosen their grip.

Working With Couples or Individually

I work with individuals exploring relationship issues, as well as couples looking to deepen their connection. Whether you're healing from betrayal, struggling with communication, navigating separation, or simply feeling emotionally distant—I offer a grounded, relational space where all of it is welcome.

We won’t aim for perfection. We’ll aim for honesty. For safety. For a kind of connection that holds room for difference, desire, and disappointment—and still chooses to stay present.

You Don’t Need to Navigate This Alone

Relationship struggles are not a sign of failure. They’re a signal that something wants to be seen, heard, and held differently.

If you’re ready to explore your relational patterns with compassion and depth, I’m here to support you.